In order to deal with conflict effectively, consider the following tips:
1. Ask the other person ‘Are you interested in resolving this conflict?’ If they are not willing to discuss the issue, you can suggest that you are willing to discuss it further when they are ready. Approaching the situation in this way puts the ball in their court, and encourages them to consider whether they are resistant or ready to discuss the issue.
2. Take turns to describe the conflict. Whilst each person is speaking, the other person listens respectfully, avoiding facial expressions that are hostile.
3. Avoid making accusations, for instance ‘You are being difficult’. Instead refer to their behaviour, for example ‘When you are standing by my desk talking on your mobile phone, I find it difficult to concentrate on my work’.
4. Make the discussion as specific as possible. Describe what happened in an objective way. So rather than saying ‘You were late for the meeting’, you could say ‘The meeting started at 10am, you arrived at 10.15am’. The sentence ‘You were late’ implies that the other person was in the wrong, whereas the second sentence is a statement of facts.
5. Be open to feedback, and open to reflecting on your own behaviour. Sometimes we can be talking in a certain way or adopting a posture, that others react to negatively, without even realising it.
6. Work towards finding a solution or agreement. If you cannot achieve this, you may have to respectfully agree to disagree.
Simon Pimenta
No comments:
Post a Comment